Friday, January 26, 2007


i can't reconcile these images.

my brain won't make the leap. it walks right up to the edge, looks into the abyss, then turns and runs back to the fog. my brain is such a girly-man sometimes.

arnold schwarzenegger, hollywood's baddest-ever action star, looks like his terminator warranty expired. a while ago. and now he's stuck lugging around all kinds of artificial parts: heart valves, a hip, cables and screws in his leg, and who know what all else.

in fairness, these days arnold is governor of california, the 7th largest economy in the world. it's possible his day-to-day responsibilities occasionally may take precedence over his once-rigorous workout schedule. but still...does he have to look so human?

just 20 years ago arnold looked like this...

"If it bleeds, we can kill it."

that was one bad man...and he was 6 years younger than i am now. the takeaway? if it can happen to arnold it can happen to anyone.

but maybe there's some wiggle room here. it's possible his current condition is the result of years of steroid abuse and raucous living. that his body is saying, "payback...this time it's for real."

in contrast, my substance abuse consists of a couple cookies after dinner and the glass of red wine i'm working on. i consider both to be therapeutic.

so maybe, with luck and a couple strategic advances in medical technology, when i'm 60 i can look not-a-day-over 52.

i'm talking theoretically here, so i'd ask for some latitude. thank you.

in a world where some seek to reshape the future by changing the it asking too much for a role model to set the bar somewhere above average? no. it is not.

i worked out today. i'll try to work out at least one day this weekend. and not because i want to be an action hero (though that'd be nice).

partly, i just don't want my warranty to expire. mostly, because i like the red wine. and the cookies.

Friday, January 19, 2007


i have a responsibility

monday was the martin luther king federal holiday.

it passed, as it usually does any more, without much fuss. perfunctory retrospectives, speculation on what he'd think of thus-and-such, angst over our collective malaise.

the conventional wisdom is that king was a great man, a passionate voice at a critical time, an inspiration to millions. despite that, it's understood that today he'd be excoriated, marginalized by the industrial christian right.

lenin said religion is the opiate of the masses. maybe, back in the day. now, though, television serves that role. we have become sedate, lethargic, indifferent. we stand by idly as a low-IQ underachiever dumbs us all down.

what would king do about it? he'd organize, and rally and march. he'd sit with cindy sheehan in the halls of congress, and demonstrate in front of the white house. he'd work tirelessly in new orleans and demand attention be paid to the city's ongoing tragedy.

but he's gone, and his day has become just another monday. an empty gesture. business as usual.

i doubt dr. king would care about the holiday. but i bet he'd care deeply that the principles of his life's work have been so casually discarded.

Saturday, January 06, 2007

you're gonna like the way you look...*

* i guarantee it.

the party is heating up in the green zone. and this week, after a long (long) wait, george bush appears ready to throw some more flammable things on the fire.
Bush told more than a dozen senators Friday that he would settle on [escalation] only if the Iraqi government offered certain guarantees, according to senators who attended the meeting.
guarantees from the iraqi government. what do you suppose those are worth? say, for example, that the iraqi government guaranteed the sun would come up tomorrow...wouldn'tcha immediately go out and buy some flashlights?

in one of its last and most ironic (or is it iconic) acts, the 109th congress set aside $20 million to celebrate the u.s. victory in iraq and afghanistan.

sounds like fun, doesn't it? wonder what they'll be serving...